I lost my baby a few months back, on April 5, 2008, I was suppose to give birth to my first child.
We have been doing fertility for so long, I am just really hurting that after all of this we are now starting over.
The babys room is just perfect, and my mind and heart are finally open to being a mother.
How does one deal with the last few weeks of what would have been your ninth month?
My heart hurts, and I am just so sad!
Im not a young chick anymore and I feel like that was it, especially after hearing your not pregant so many times now.
IVF was not easy, now what? :( I just feel no hope.How do you deal with the day your baby was suppose to be born?
You are blessed to reach out. Don't lose hope and don't let that sadness swallow you, as it will if you give it too much power or permission to control you. Your feelings of sadness and loss are so valid, and time will gradually lessen their grip on you. Remember times in your life where you were so sad and couldn't imagine it would end, and remember that it did end. And it will end again. You will find joy again. Try to do things that you enjoy and that take you outside of your head. Try to have fun, if you can. I know, as I am experiencing a loss right now that is weighing me down all day, until I put myself in a situation where I am in a community activity, or listening to something that engages me, so that I am able to get out of my head and take a break from my sorrow. You have experienced loss. But you are not that loss. You will have other experiences. Talk to your partner and friends about all your thoughts on your loss. I think it is important to honor the day that your baby was supposed to be born, just that you are aware of its spirit, and its gift it gave to you. The pregnancy, however long it was, still left you with gifts that are positive, I am sure, outside of the loss. An awareness of your connection and the miracle of life--to know what your mom felt.
And don't rush yourself--wait until you feel healed and resolved again to take on the energy of getting pregnant again. Your spirit will be renewed if you so desire (look at nature--it is always renewing). Don't lose hope!!! I will pray for you, too.How do you deal with the day your baby was suppose to be born?
I am so so sorry for your loss.
Your story made me cry :(
I have never experienced such a loss, and I pray that I never do. It is horrible that anyone has to experience something so tragic and heartbreaking. I'm sorry. Just have hope and keep trying. You deserve to be a mother so you can share the love you obviously have for others.
I will pray for you.
Oh my, that is seriously heartbreaking. I do not have issues with fertility, but I can understand how desperate you are for a child right now.
I am so sorry for your loss, and I am sure that you know that there is nothing ANYONE can say to help.
I am sure you have tried Clomid, and have you had testing, to see what the issue is?
I,again, am sorry for your loss.
i'm sooooooooooooo sorry hun. i've had 1 lost baby and it hurt and onlytime can heal.i hope your able to try again. i did and had a beautifull little girl.. good luck and god bless
Wow, I hope your dreams come true soon. Loss of a child is not an easy thing to get through for anybody. Don't give up you will be a mommy one way or another. I hope you get some professional support, it sounds like you may be depressed, as anybody would be. Just find somebody to talk to, a friend, clergy, sister etc. Try not to focus on the day your baby was going to be born, think about the day you are going to hold your child in your arms!
Celebrate her birthday in your own way. Try to remember that she's watching you. Light a candle and think of what her wish might be. Maybe her wish might be to see you happy and full of joy for her brothers and sisters that will become her family. Plant a tree so that your family photos can have a symbol of her in them and you have a peaceful place to sit and relax.
She knows you miss her and she must feel the same. But she is secure in the fact that you will join her in your own time. Try to have that same faith - in yourself. Your life is becoming exactly what it's meant to become, and it will continue to do so.
Sometimes we forget to LOOK for the joy in what we already have. Create a happy place for a child's soul to grow.
Your story really broke my heart and brought me to tears. I am so sorry that you are going through this. But keep in mind that everything happens for a reason. Sometimes we don't know the reason and only God knows it. Also, keep in your mind that God is with you as you are going through your pain. As for your question, I know this is easier said than done, but try to deal with it like any other day. Try not to think about it as the day your baby was supposed to be born on. Consider that you don't know the date, because most babies are not born on their estimated delivery date, and if you had not lost your child, he/she would not have been born on this particular day most likely. I don't agree with celebrating this day because it's just going to put you in more pain. Acting as though it is just like any other day does not mean that you have forgotten your baby, so push those thoughts away from your mind.
All the best. You are in my prayers. I hope you get what you want and that God helps you through your pain.
Hi.
I come to look for you, you recently anwsered my question and your reply had a great impact on me, and really hit home and I want to thank you for that.
It is woman like you that have helped me made the choice I did about my unplanned pregnancy and woman like you who help me to embrace it.
You truelly deserve to be a mother, and although I cant give you any advice on how to deal with your lose there is one thing I want you to know, through your pain you are managing to reach out and touch people, well you certaintly did for me. I truelly believe good things happen to good people and I pray for you that some way some how you become the mother you deserve to be,
Sunday, December 11, 2011
How do you deal with keeping your relationship in the closet?
All of my peers and friends know that I'm openly bisexual my mother doesn't know because I don't want her to cut me off financially cuz I'm 17 but anyways
I'm in a relationship with a girl and we've been dating for almost 5 months she's gay and still in the closet and our relationship well we've been keeping that in the closet too. She has her reasons and I'm fully supportive of her everyone needs to come out in their own time without pressure.
But my question is has this ever happened to you ?? How did you deal ? Sometimes its frustrating you know
Something to add is that in august we're both going away to college (the same college) and she said in college she wont have a problem being open about it so if we stay together until then thats something to look forward to in the future.How do you deal with keeping your relationship in the closet?
Bit of a useless answer but I love the question.
Yet I have heard that some people find it hard, as in essence, they feel they are returning back into the closet.
But tbh if your young and in love, it must be a small problem. I know I wouldn't care in the short run but maybe in the long run I would. So her acceptance in college is something to look forward to I would say in my opinion.How do you deal with keeping your relationship in the closet?
My gf and I are able to support ourselves completely, and yet she is in the closet. It is hard at times to be secretive, but I know one day things will be different. I love her, so it's not all that hard to do something like that for her.
I haven't been in a relationship yet but, if I'm ever in one I'm sure it would be a secret to everyone else except close friends since my friends know that I'm gay.
I can imagine this would be difficult for the both of you. The only thing that I would suggest for your gf is to come out once she goes to college like you said she plans to.
As for you I would say that you come out about your relationship when you have your own money so your mom won't cut you off when you really need it.
i understand about not able to come out.. im bi and i can't either i have a gf that im moving in with soon but my mom just thinks were Friends. and its sad to know you can't turn to the ones who gave you birth you know??.
i would try to deal with it the best way you can and like one of my Friends said somethings are just best left unsaid but then Again its hard to not say anything when you really just want tell everyone your really in love with that might be Special someone...
best of luck
I'm in a relationship with a girl and we've been dating for almost 5 months she's gay and still in the closet and our relationship well we've been keeping that in the closet too. She has her reasons and I'm fully supportive of her everyone needs to come out in their own time without pressure.
But my question is has this ever happened to you ?? How did you deal ? Sometimes its frustrating you know
Something to add is that in august we're both going away to college (the same college) and she said in college she wont have a problem being open about it so if we stay together until then thats something to look forward to in the future.How do you deal with keeping your relationship in the closet?
Bit of a useless answer but I love the question.
Yet I have heard that some people find it hard, as in essence, they feel they are returning back into the closet.
But tbh if your young and in love, it must be a small problem. I know I wouldn't care in the short run but maybe in the long run I would. So her acceptance in college is something to look forward to I would say in my opinion.How do you deal with keeping your relationship in the closet?
My gf and I are able to support ourselves completely, and yet she is in the closet. It is hard at times to be secretive, but I know one day things will be different. I love her, so it's not all that hard to do something like that for her.
I haven't been in a relationship yet but, if I'm ever in one I'm sure it would be a secret to everyone else except close friends since my friends know that I'm gay.
I can imagine this would be difficult for the both of you. The only thing that I would suggest for your gf is to come out once she goes to college like you said she plans to.
As for you I would say that you come out about your relationship when you have your own money so your mom won't cut you off when you really need it.
i understand about not able to come out.. im bi and i can't either i have a gf that im moving in with soon but my mom just thinks were Friends. and its sad to know you can't turn to the ones who gave you birth you know??.
i would try to deal with it the best way you can and like one of my Friends said somethings are just best left unsaid but then Again its hard to not say anything when you really just want tell everyone your really in love with that might be Special someone...
best of luck
My parents are always arguing. Should I just ignore it?
My parents are always arguing. Some times it's about my grades or that I'm fat or how much money we have. My mum often throws stuff around and a few times they have hit my dad. My dad says to be and my sister that he hates our mum because she is blaming him and other things which I am not putting on here. My dad says that it's because of us he's not divorced my mum because he believes that me and my sister should have a mother figure and he is ';grossed out by periods so your mother should deal with it'; (his words no mine). My mother is nasty to be and my sister as well but if we try to mention it he goes ';You think its bad for you, you should hear what she says to me'; my mum hits us and call us etc. I'm feeling guilty about it as it's for us my dad is unhappy by living with our mum. My dad takes me and my sister away some week-end to be away from our mum and he is buying a house a long way from where we live and is going about putting furniture in it etc. that my mum doesn't know about. Should I just ignore it? I tried to talk to some-one at school but they just called home and it made the situation worse. I self-harm and this is a big part of the reason why (though I belive there to be other causes contribuiting). ThanksMy parents are always arguing. Should I just ignore it?
I really feel for you! It sounds like you and your sister are copping all the crap because your irresponsible parents are not able to communicate honesty to each other. You have been caught in the middle of this situation and unfortunately they are so absorbed in their own feelings that they can not see how much this is affecting and hurting you.
As far as your father expressing his dislike for your mum to you but don't having to guts to be honest to her has put you in awkward position, I would suggest that you call the helpline below as they are free counseling and offer professional advise to any one of any age with any problem.
Lifeline: 131114
please call them as there is no need to go through this with out help.
Be nice to your self, you don't deserve to be mistreated or mistreat yourself, you are a beautiful humane being just trying to find the answers in a difficult situation. Don't be so hard on yourself!
Take care :)My parents are always arguing. Should I just ignore it?
you could try to.but it may not help
How old are you?
There is a book out there that I just read called ';A child called it'; that I think you should get from a library or a bookstore, it's VERY disturbing, but a good book on child abuse.............this child went through the same thing with people calling home and it had a positive end (well, sort of).
I think your mom needs some help. Getting away with your dad would be the best, but please do read this book, it shows how spouses can sometimes be spellbound by the spouse's wishes.........
I really feel for you! It sounds like you and your sister are copping all the crap because your irresponsible parents are not able to communicate honesty to each other. You have been caught in the middle of this situation and unfortunately they are so absorbed in their own feelings that they can not see how much this is affecting and hurting you.
As far as your father expressing his dislike for your mum to you but don't having to guts to be honest to her has put you in awkward position, I would suggest that you call the helpline below as they are free counseling and offer professional advise to any one of any age with any problem.
Lifeline: 131114
please call them as there is no need to go through this with out help.
Be nice to your self, you don't deserve to be mistreated or mistreat yourself, you are a beautiful humane being just trying to find the answers in a difficult situation. Don't be so hard on yourself!
Take care :)My parents are always arguing. Should I just ignore it?
you could try to.but it may not help
How old are you?
There is a book out there that I just read called ';A child called it'; that I think you should get from a library or a bookstore, it's VERY disturbing, but a good book on child abuse.............this child went through the same thing with people calling home and it had a positive end (well, sort of).
I think your mom needs some help. Getting away with your dad would be the best, but please do read this book, it shows how spouses can sometimes be spellbound by the spouse's wishes.........
How do u deal with Christmas without your mom?
My mom passed away 3 years ago.....most days i do really well...she is always on my mind sometime during the day but on my birthday, Mothers Day, her birthday, Thanksgiving and Christmas it seems so overwelming...help me learn to deal with it....How do u deal with Christmas without your mom?
My wife lost her mother three years ago too- to breast cancer.
It still is a massive burden of a vast range of emotions for her to deal with.
All I can suggest is perhaps not to try to attempt to make everything seem 'alright' and continue on as if she never existed, but to acknowledge her absence perhaps in a symbolic way%26gt; These are just suggestions but perhaps lighting a candle for her at church, donating money to charity in her name/honour or even a quiet talk with her (not even a prayer or religious type talk/prayer).
It is always okay to cry, remember, ache, yearn and hurt. Honestly (and I lost both parents), you will bear this kind of emptiness for the rest of your life- BUT that isn't to say that the rest of your life should be a waking misery. They will always be in your thoughts/wishes/prayers and you will cope best if you don't intentionally push them out of your conscious mind. In time, you will learn to cope with the pain associated with such symbolic occasions.
Stay as close as possible to your remaining close family members and be supportive of each other.
Try and live in a way that would do her proud, remember her always- for immortality is only in the remembered thoughts of the living.
I hope you have a safe and relatively happy Christmas- I'm sure your mum would want the same.How do u deal with Christmas without your mom?
trhink about all the good times
I'm sorry... I guess just try to surround yourself with other people you love, and try not to be alone much. Keep yourself busy...and if you feel comfortable, talk with someone else about the good Christmas memories you had with you mom. Remember too that Christmas will be over soon.
Just think that one day you'll see and hug her again.It's just a matter of time.
I have lost all of my family over the course of a few years and this time of year is tough, but it seems to get a bit easier as the years go by but it never goes away completely.
just keep on living Mine died in 77 right before Christmas...
You are very fortunate to having had good memories of a good Mom. I had an abusive one and felt relief to be away from her.
I am glad you have these feelings.
My mother never forgave me for converting to Judaism, and made life hell for me. Christmas was unusually bad for all of us.
No-----my life is much better without her and her bigotry.
I lost my Dad couple years back, and I know what youre sayin....I think it makes me appreciate my Mom more....just think about her everyday and smile and that'll help on the major holidays.
I dont think you ever stop missing them..Smile, we love you!
my Mom just passed away Oct 23rd, so this is my first Christmas without her, and yes its hard,,,, i would suggest trying to change up your routine a little, while sticking to the old traditions,,,,,, maybe make a dish she always liked or made, to remember her by,,,, but yet add in something new, also, i light a candle in rememberance of her,,,, on special days,,,, not that you can isolate your grief, but it does help to have a set time to dwell on it,,, feel it, then move on,,accept that she lived her life her on earth, and it was her time to go on,,,,,
Just think about all the good things that you used to do with her, although its gonna seem really sad, those times were happy, and i'm sure she'd always want you to remember how lovely the holidays were with her. Maybe have a point in the day where you get a new Christmas tradition to remember her, like lighting a candle or wrapping a small present something she would always have, and open that for her. it will be hard however, know how much love you two had for each other and that never ends, its just a beginning of new Christmas traditions that still include her. Hope you have a great time hun, xx
Ok. This one hits close to home. I lost my mom last year. Christmas is/was her favorite holiday. I do not know any magical end all to the pain. You are going to miss her. But just remember that she is still there with you. I went ahead and got my mom a flower for Christmas. Just so she has something under the tree. I know its odd, but it makes me feel better knowing that she is still a part of the celebration. I guess I am really not too much help. But just keep her a part of those times when you miss her most. Maybe that will help out a bit...
my mother died in '95. i finally accepted it abut 2 years ago, but the pain wont go away. i love my mama very much. when i feel sad and angry about it i just think of the good times we had. lol she even played catch with me. sewed patches on my bluejeans as a little kid. she would hum when she did that. now of course i think of these things almost everyday because i miss her so much. this may be weird but i have her SSC in my wallet. all the pictures are too big to carry around. ok so i give you a virtual hug and try to send good energy in your direction.
~peace~
Sweetie, I know what you are feeling I lost my Father at Christmas and 7 years later lost my Mother on Thanksgiving. I also lost my baby that was due at Christmas. I, like you, do well most days but what gets me through are happy memories of those holidays with them. As time goes by there will be ups and downs one year you will get through with flying colors and the next you might miss her terribly, this is normal. Think of good times you had with your Mother and remember too she wouldn't want you to be sad and she is always with you in your heart. I hope this helps, and know you aren't alone. Best wishes.
Sweetheart, please go to this site immediately. I know you stated its been three years since your mom was called forth, but you may still have some stages yet to graduate from.
I have not personally lost my mother, but over the last two years, since shes been diagnosed, it is borrowed time she lives on. Sadly, Scleroderma has no cure, and the pain she endures daily makes me want to scream for him to take her, why the suffering?
I don't know the circumstances surrounding your moms passing. I know losing someone unexpectedly is different from a long illness.
Its been a process over my 41 years on earth, but I do not fear death. I feel all who pass before us are in a place that is so incomprehensible to those living. Your mother is experiencing such a magnificently wonderful existence right now. The things she can do would just boggle our mind. I also believe they can look over those living. That they hear everything we say to them, about them, shoot, they can probably hear whatever they want!
I know loneliness is a major factor, especially during those times you mentioned. I will say this: when we help others less fortunate, helping them takes our mind off of our own troubles for awhile. Of course, its true, time does soften everything.
My prayers and thoughts are with you and your family this season. God bless and God speed.
My wife lost her mother three years ago too- to breast cancer.
It still is a massive burden of a vast range of emotions for her to deal with.
All I can suggest is perhaps not to try to attempt to make everything seem 'alright' and continue on as if she never existed, but to acknowledge her absence perhaps in a symbolic way%26gt; These are just suggestions but perhaps lighting a candle for her at church, donating money to charity in her name/honour or even a quiet talk with her (not even a prayer or religious type talk/prayer).
It is always okay to cry, remember, ache, yearn and hurt. Honestly (and I lost both parents), you will bear this kind of emptiness for the rest of your life- BUT that isn't to say that the rest of your life should be a waking misery. They will always be in your thoughts/wishes/prayers and you will cope best if you don't intentionally push them out of your conscious mind. In time, you will learn to cope with the pain associated with such symbolic occasions.
Stay as close as possible to your remaining close family members and be supportive of each other.
Try and live in a way that would do her proud, remember her always- for immortality is only in the remembered thoughts of the living.
I hope you have a safe and relatively happy Christmas- I'm sure your mum would want the same.How do u deal with Christmas without your mom?
trhink about all the good times
I'm sorry... I guess just try to surround yourself with other people you love, and try not to be alone much. Keep yourself busy...and if you feel comfortable, talk with someone else about the good Christmas memories you had with you mom. Remember too that Christmas will be over soon.
Just think that one day you'll see and hug her again.It's just a matter of time.
I have lost all of my family over the course of a few years and this time of year is tough, but it seems to get a bit easier as the years go by but it never goes away completely.
just keep on living Mine died in 77 right before Christmas...
You are very fortunate to having had good memories of a good Mom. I had an abusive one and felt relief to be away from her.
I am glad you have these feelings.
My mother never forgave me for converting to Judaism, and made life hell for me. Christmas was unusually bad for all of us.
No-----my life is much better without her and her bigotry.
I lost my Dad couple years back, and I know what youre sayin....I think it makes me appreciate my Mom more....just think about her everyday and smile and that'll help on the major holidays.
I dont think you ever stop missing them..Smile, we love you!
my Mom just passed away Oct 23rd, so this is my first Christmas without her, and yes its hard,,,, i would suggest trying to change up your routine a little, while sticking to the old traditions,,,,,, maybe make a dish she always liked or made, to remember her by,,,, but yet add in something new, also, i light a candle in rememberance of her,,,, on special days,,,, not that you can isolate your grief, but it does help to have a set time to dwell on it,,, feel it, then move on,,accept that she lived her life her on earth, and it was her time to go on,,,,,
Just think about all the good things that you used to do with her, although its gonna seem really sad, those times were happy, and i'm sure she'd always want you to remember how lovely the holidays were with her. Maybe have a point in the day where you get a new Christmas tradition to remember her, like lighting a candle or wrapping a small present something she would always have, and open that for her. it will be hard however, know how much love you two had for each other and that never ends, its just a beginning of new Christmas traditions that still include her. Hope you have a great time hun, xx
Ok. This one hits close to home. I lost my mom last year. Christmas is/was her favorite holiday. I do not know any magical end all to the pain. You are going to miss her. But just remember that she is still there with you. I went ahead and got my mom a flower for Christmas. Just so she has something under the tree. I know its odd, but it makes me feel better knowing that she is still a part of the celebration. I guess I am really not too much help. But just keep her a part of those times when you miss her most. Maybe that will help out a bit...
my mother died in '95. i finally accepted it abut 2 years ago, but the pain wont go away. i love my mama very much. when i feel sad and angry about it i just think of the good times we had. lol she even played catch with me. sewed patches on my bluejeans as a little kid. she would hum when she did that. now of course i think of these things almost everyday because i miss her so much. this may be weird but i have her SSC in my wallet. all the pictures are too big to carry around. ok so i give you a virtual hug and try to send good energy in your direction.
~peace~
Sweetie, I know what you are feeling I lost my Father at Christmas and 7 years later lost my Mother on Thanksgiving. I also lost my baby that was due at Christmas. I, like you, do well most days but what gets me through are happy memories of those holidays with them. As time goes by there will be ups and downs one year you will get through with flying colors and the next you might miss her terribly, this is normal. Think of good times you had with your Mother and remember too she wouldn't want you to be sad and she is always with you in your heart. I hope this helps, and know you aren't alone. Best wishes.
Sweetheart, please go to this site immediately. I know you stated its been three years since your mom was called forth, but you may still have some stages yet to graduate from.
I have not personally lost my mother, but over the last two years, since shes been diagnosed, it is borrowed time she lives on. Sadly, Scleroderma has no cure, and the pain she endures daily makes me want to scream for him to take her, why the suffering?
I don't know the circumstances surrounding your moms passing. I know losing someone unexpectedly is different from a long illness.
Its been a process over my 41 years on earth, but I do not fear death. I feel all who pass before us are in a place that is so incomprehensible to those living. Your mother is experiencing such a magnificently wonderful existence right now. The things she can do would just boggle our mind. I also believe they can look over those living. That they hear everything we say to them, about them, shoot, they can probably hear whatever they want!
I know loneliness is a major factor, especially during those times you mentioned. I will say this: when we help others less fortunate, helping them takes our mind off of our own troubles for awhile. Of course, its true, time does soften everything.
My prayers and thoughts are with you and your family this season. God bless and God speed.
Moms How do you deal with leaving your newborn?
On Sunday Me and hubby are going to New York for a well deserved Baby break as my SIL says. Her and her husband gave us two tickets as our christmas present .My thing Is my son is only 6 weeks old and I do not want to leave him ! For the whole six weeks of his existence I have not left him ! How do you deal with it ?? I do not want to be the freaky mother who calls every ten minutes but I think I will go insane ! I can't really say no so its like I haave to go :-(
Also , What should I pack for him ??? He will only be there for one day and one night . (Sunday we will drop him off at around 2:00pm then we will pick him up at 9:00 Am Monday %26gt;) My sister in law has a ten month old baby so she knows what to do but I am stuck as to what to bring ?? I am breast feeding (I pump to ) .
Thanks mommies !Moms How do you deal with leaving your newborn?
I first thought you were going away for a week or so...but for over night...I have done this. My SIL took my 3 week old son over night because I was suffering with migraines and my husband was working and couldn't look after him while I slept(I was quite ill so it wasn't a vacation, but still not easy). She took him from about 6pm until 11am the next morning.
All we packed was diapers, a few changes of clothing, his favorite(or most comfortable) blankets and formula since we were not breast feeding.
For just an over night stay I would pack the way we did. A few changes of clothing, lots of diapers/wipes/cream and pumped BM. Just think of what you would normally be using in those hours, and pack it.
I called my SIL in the middle of the night, and the next morning after I woke up to see how things were. She had raised 3 kids of her own, so I trusted her with my son. Try not to worry, sometimes us mommies just need a break, no matter what the break is.
Edit: for a true break, send along all your son's laundry to be washed...lol My SIL used to come by, pick up our clothing for us and wash it, fold it and bring it back(only in the beginning) because we lived in an apartment building and had to pay for it.Moms How do you deal with leaving your newborn?
at only 6weeks she already thinks you need a break? is your baby that hard work? i don't mean it badly i just mean does he cry a lot etc... my niece cried a LOT during her first 3weeks and my sister found it VERY hard to cope so i understand. just if the baby is a good one, 6weeks is very early to take a break and i can so see why you don't want to go. i would hate to leave him so young. they really should have asked you first i mean its a nice gesture but you are leaving your child here and if your not ready you should not feel ';forced to'; i would gently tell her that she can have the tickets and you will take care of her baby, because your just not ready.
however if you want to go on some level, then just do your best to ';forget'; about calling every 10mins because you wont enjoy your trip that way. just pack everything he uses in a day normally and some extra, pump the normal amount of feed he has then some extra.
good luckremove xp antivirus
Also , What should I pack for him ??? He will only be there for one day and one night . (Sunday we will drop him off at around 2:00pm then we will pick him up at 9:00 Am Monday %26gt;) My sister in law has a ten month old baby so she knows what to do but I am stuck as to what to bring ?? I am breast feeding (I pump to ) .
Thanks mommies !Moms How do you deal with leaving your newborn?
I first thought you were going away for a week or so...but for over night...I have done this. My SIL took my 3 week old son over night because I was suffering with migraines and my husband was working and couldn't look after him while I slept(I was quite ill so it wasn't a vacation, but still not easy). She took him from about 6pm until 11am the next morning.
All we packed was diapers, a few changes of clothing, his favorite(or most comfortable) blankets and formula since we were not breast feeding.
For just an over night stay I would pack the way we did. A few changes of clothing, lots of diapers/wipes/cream and pumped BM. Just think of what you would normally be using in those hours, and pack it.
I called my SIL in the middle of the night, and the next morning after I woke up to see how things were. She had raised 3 kids of her own, so I trusted her with my son. Try not to worry, sometimes us mommies just need a break, no matter what the break is.
Edit: for a true break, send along all your son's laundry to be washed...lol My SIL used to come by, pick up our clothing for us and wash it, fold it and bring it back(only in the beginning) because we lived in an apartment building and had to pay for it.Moms How do you deal with leaving your newborn?
at only 6weeks she already thinks you need a break? is your baby that hard work? i don't mean it badly i just mean does he cry a lot etc... my niece cried a LOT during her first 3weeks and my sister found it VERY hard to cope so i understand. just if the baby is a good one, 6weeks is very early to take a break and i can so see why you don't want to go. i would hate to leave him so young. they really should have asked you first i mean its a nice gesture but you are leaving your child here and if your not ready you should not feel ';forced to'; i would gently tell her that she can have the tickets and you will take care of her baby, because your just not ready.
however if you want to go on some level, then just do your best to ';forget'; about calling every 10mins because you wont enjoy your trip that way. just pack everything he uses in a day normally and some extra, pump the normal amount of feed he has then some extra.
good luck
Is it haram to celebrate mother's day?
Ok, I know mother's day is not islamic holiday, but is it haram to celebrate it anyways?
I believe that you should celebrate or love your mother every single day allah granted you to live on this earth, but why people make such big deal on only May 10?
Also, my mother keeps bringing up how sunday is mother's day and all of her friends are celebrating with their kids (non muslim friends), does this mean she's giving me hints to celebrate with her? Should I get her gift?Is it haram to celebrate mother's day?
I dont think it would be haram but the salafi scholars would disagree saying that it is imitating the kaffirs.
But I beleive that for a Muslim, everyday should be mothers day.
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;…Is it haram to celebrate mother's day?
We should not get wrapped into these things. Why reserve one day to celebrate your mother. Respect her every day of the year. Salam.
No I don't think it's haram...celebrating Christmas is haram though. I don;t see how Mothers Day is wrong, because it's not a relegious holiday or anything.
Everyday is mothers day.
Heaven is locked under mamas feet after all.
lol
yeah ur mums hinting
its halal to celebrate mothers day
i even asked my husband he looked at me like iwas crazy and he said you get massive reward for that
but he says its best not to actually celebrate it on the kaffir's special day
like i turned 17 on the 4th may but we didnt do nything except till yesterday
cuz its copying the kaffir by celebrating my birthday on my birthday
wow who do yall think you are? you think everything the ''kaffir'' does is evil? well my god its lucky we arent copying the muslim or there'd be bombs and shootings everywhere on earth!
AISHA--you say you're an alima masha Allah...can you please present your proof?
The prophet (saw) said we have TWO holidays. Eid al Adha %26amp; Eid al Fitr.
There are no celebrations in Islaam except Friday the weekly ‘Eid, the first day of Shawwal – ’Eidal-Adha. The day of ’Arafah might be called an ‘Eid for those who are at ’Arafah on that day, and the days of Tashreeq, following ’Eidul-Adha.
As for birthday celebrations for a person or his children, or wedding anniversaries or the like, none of them are legislated and they are closer to being innovations than to being allowed.
Shaykh Muhammad bin Saalih al-`Uthaymeen
Fatawa Arkanul-Islaam, DARUSSALAM, p265
Blessings to me you can celebrate Mother's Day every day in your heart by just telling your Mom how much you care and Love her..... I am a Panamenian we celebrate our Mother's day on December the 8 and since I am away from my mom and most of my family i call my mom each day and sent her some love, So maybe you can just tell her you love her for all of the things she did or are still doing for you and your........ Nice Question I like it... Take care.
no
Salam for you. There are 2 opinions about celebrating the birth day in Islam (1) Celebrating the birthday of anything is haram because it is bid'ah that during the era of Muhammad pbuh there is celebration about
that although its condition existed Bid'ah is good doing which could not be accepted by Allah and the related person will have sin. (2).There is no prohibition of celebrating birth day in the Qur'an and in the hadith so it is halal or allowed in Islam as long as that we do not worship the related person whose birthday is celebrated. and we just only reminding his/her good deeds and we want to follow him or her.as a good muslim.
Which one you will choose it is up to you.
I believe that you should celebrate or love your mother every single day allah granted you to live on this earth, but why people make such big deal on only May 10?
Also, my mother keeps bringing up how sunday is mother's day and all of her friends are celebrating with their kids (non muslim friends), does this mean she's giving me hints to celebrate with her? Should I get her gift?Is it haram to celebrate mother's day?
I dont think it would be haram but the salafi scholars would disagree saying that it is imitating the kaffirs.
But I beleive that for a Muslim, everyday should be mothers day.
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;…Is it haram to celebrate mother's day?
We should not get wrapped into these things. Why reserve one day to celebrate your mother. Respect her every day of the year. Salam.
No I don't think it's haram...celebrating Christmas is haram though. I don;t see how Mothers Day is wrong, because it's not a relegious holiday or anything.
Everyday is mothers day.
Heaven is locked under mamas feet after all.
lol
yeah ur mums hinting
its halal to celebrate mothers day
i even asked my husband he looked at me like iwas crazy and he said you get massive reward for that
but he says its best not to actually celebrate it on the kaffir's special day
like i turned 17 on the 4th may but we didnt do nything except till yesterday
cuz its copying the kaffir by celebrating my birthday on my birthday
wow who do yall think you are? you think everything the ''kaffir'' does is evil? well my god its lucky we arent copying the muslim or there'd be bombs and shootings everywhere on earth!
AISHA--you say you're an alima masha Allah...can you please present your proof?
The prophet (saw) said we have TWO holidays. Eid al Adha %26amp; Eid al Fitr.
There are no celebrations in Islaam except Friday the weekly ‘Eid, the first day of Shawwal – ’Eidal-Adha. The day of ’Arafah might be called an ‘Eid for those who are at ’Arafah on that day, and the days of Tashreeq, following ’Eidul-Adha.
As for birthday celebrations for a person or his children, or wedding anniversaries or the like, none of them are legislated and they are closer to being innovations than to being allowed.
Shaykh Muhammad bin Saalih al-`Uthaymeen
Fatawa Arkanul-Islaam, DARUSSALAM, p265
Blessings to me you can celebrate Mother's Day every day in your heart by just telling your Mom how much you care and Love her..... I am a Panamenian we celebrate our Mother's day on December the 8 and since I am away from my mom and most of my family i call my mom each day and sent her some love, So maybe you can just tell her you love her for all of the things she did or are still doing for you and your........ Nice Question I like it... Take care.
no
Salam for you. There are 2 opinions about celebrating the birth day in Islam (1) Celebrating the birthday of anything is haram because it is bid'ah that during the era of Muhammad pbuh there is celebration about
that although its condition existed Bid'ah is good doing which could not be accepted by Allah and the related person will have sin. (2).There is no prohibition of celebrating birth day in the Qur'an and in the hadith so it is halal or allowed in Islam as long as that we do not worship the related person whose birthday is celebrated. and we just only reminding his/her good deeds and we want to follow him or her.as a good muslim.
Which one you will choose it is up to you.
How are you suposed to deal with the first mothers day after your 8yo son and only child passed away?
my baby is gone and no one understands me. I am supposed to act like I am ME I am not that person anymore , I don't know who I am. I am scared and more alone than anyone in this world. I guarentee that cause I have noone. and the one I want to understand says he does but when I even ask for a HUG it's like I just asked for a kidney!!!!How are you suposed to deal with the first mothers day after your 8yo son and only child passed away?
i am so sorry. i had a nephew that i was extremely close to pass away about 6 months ago. i was so down and upset for about a month, but then i stopped dwelling and i re-lived all the good times we shared together. disney world, dairy queen, etc. etc. it was very hard for a while, trying to think about good things and good memories when someone you were so close to is gone, but after a while you have to realize, like i did, that he was gone and not coming back. he is sitting next to God up in heaven and that needs to be respected. just remember all the good times w/ your son and soon things will start to look up for you. i know you will never get over it completely, that ache in your heart will always be there...but if you dont stop dwelling you will never get anywhere. =)How are you suposed to deal with the first mothers day after your 8yo son and only child passed away?
we dealt with it by making sure hugs and laughter were aplenty :)
it'll be okay,u r still a mother and he is still ya son,i know u might not want to but have another child a let him live through that child
Im so so sorry to hear that, i hope one day you will get to be happy again, but there isn't much to do. Nothing is stronger than a child passing away, you're just going to have to greive a while, maybe busying yourself in something will leave just a little less time to be as depressed although it wont take the pain away completely.I'm with you. *hug* ps(i don't know if you're religious or not but if u are u should look up these scriptures in the bible:Isaiah25:8,9 John5:28,29 John11:25,26 Psalms146:5,9)
he sounds like hes got issues. i am so sorry for your loss.you poor woman. i can only imagine with tears in my heart how you must feel.i have an 8 year old and i know it would be the worst kind of pain.nothing will stop your pain. no words. just be as strong as you can and take it one day at a time. maybe 4 mothers day it would be best not to be alone ,try to stay busy.remember he's looking down on you and doesn't want you to hurt 4-ever. good luckand sorry i can't help you
I am very sorry to know about such a tragedy in your life.
Try to be with friends or family, people who will hopefully try to cheer you up.
You are still a mom, sweetheart. You can't hear your baby, but he's telling you happy mother's day from heaven and someday you will spend eternity with him.
sorry abt that.. i know how it feels 2 lose someone so precious 2 us.
but life has 2 move on. nobody shld ask u or force u 2b urself coz losing a baby is d very worst thing a mom can experience..
if u need a hug, im here 2 give u d warmest %26amp; cozziest teddy bear hug.
i am so sorry. i had a nephew that i was extremely close to pass away about 6 months ago. i was so down and upset for about a month, but then i stopped dwelling and i re-lived all the good times we shared together. disney world, dairy queen, etc. etc. it was very hard for a while, trying to think about good things and good memories when someone you were so close to is gone, but after a while you have to realize, like i did, that he was gone and not coming back. he is sitting next to God up in heaven and that needs to be respected. just remember all the good times w/ your son and soon things will start to look up for you. i know you will never get over it completely, that ache in your heart will always be there...but if you dont stop dwelling you will never get anywhere. =)How are you suposed to deal with the first mothers day after your 8yo son and only child passed away?
we dealt with it by making sure hugs and laughter were aplenty :)
it'll be okay,u r still a mother and he is still ya son,i know u might not want to but have another child a let him live through that child
Im so so sorry to hear that, i hope one day you will get to be happy again, but there isn't much to do. Nothing is stronger than a child passing away, you're just going to have to greive a while, maybe busying yourself in something will leave just a little less time to be as depressed although it wont take the pain away completely.I'm with you. *hug* ps(i don't know if you're religious or not but if u are u should look up these scriptures in the bible:Isaiah25:8,9 John5:28,29 John11:25,26 Psalms146:5,9)
he sounds like hes got issues. i am so sorry for your loss.you poor woman. i can only imagine with tears in my heart how you must feel.i have an 8 year old and i know it would be the worst kind of pain.nothing will stop your pain. no words. just be as strong as you can and take it one day at a time. maybe 4 mothers day it would be best not to be alone ,try to stay busy.remember he's looking down on you and doesn't want you to hurt 4-ever. good luckand sorry i can't help you
I am very sorry to know about such a tragedy in your life.
Try to be with friends or family, people who will hopefully try to cheer you up.
You are still a mom, sweetheart. You can't hear your baby, but he's telling you happy mother's day from heaven and someday you will spend eternity with him.
sorry abt that.. i know how it feels 2 lose someone so precious 2 us.
but life has 2 move on. nobody shld ask u or force u 2b urself coz losing a baby is d very worst thing a mom can experience..
if u need a hug, im here 2 give u d warmest %26amp; cozziest teddy bear hug.
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