How do you deal with a very hostle mother in law when your husband loves her?

How do I get my husband to c she is toxic?How do you deal with a very hostle mother in law when your husband loves her?
you cant. that would be wrong. that would be telling your husband to chose between her and you. that's his mother and will always be there regardless.



you need to talk to your husband about your true feelings about her and come up with a resolution to make things less hostile and reduce the tension.



maybe you might have to consider skipping the visits to her house.



goodluck.How do you deal with a very hostle mother in law when your husband loves her?
set up cameras to catch her in the act. If not just call her a ***** %26amp; tell her her son loves you %26amp; there aint sh*t she can do about it! Put nasty things in her beverages, make her life hell.



or slip her some hug drugs n talk it over.



or get her tanked n ask what her damn problem is.
Forget the mother in law and deal with the husband. If you can deal with the husband you have things well under control. But remember, if it was not for her, you would be married to a different man. So careful how you deal with them
Guess what ?he'll have to see it on his own with no help. I would just get even with her and make sure you do it when he's not around. Then when she goes crazy and tries to get your hubby to side with her, just blow it off. It works!
Do not let her cause you to accept her unrealistic approach to life.

Do conduct yourself civilly, inasmuch as you can. But: Please, hold your ground! State your limits.

Hostility oftentimes is a form a of control....listen to the words. respond with your knowledge of what is right!
he's a very smart man...keep him....
I had the same problem. My husband over heard my mother in law on the phone with me and witnessed just how aweful she was to me and he stood up to her I wish I could say things have been better now she's mad at me because he stuck up for me but at least he knows what I have to deal with, nothing pleases her. I did get him to move 2,000 miles away from her so it's only phone calls and since call ID I don't have to answer if he's not around. Good luck!
That will always be the first woman who loved him. So he will always love her unconditionally. The best way to deal with her is to find common ground. Don't talk bad about her to your husband(that is toxic itself) Try to love her unconditionally just as he does and you will find that you will be happier with your relationship with him.
What are the consequences of his continued support of her? Loving your mother doesn't mean that you allow her to abuse his wife nor does it mean that his children (if any) should be witness to their father being treated without respect. The inevitable arguments regarding this isn't healthy for the relationship either. He needs to be shocked. LEAVE him. '; A husband vows to leave his mother and father and stick to his wife.'; Upon returning cut her out of the loop. No pictures ; No phone calls etc...

Until he makes a stand she won't back off. You don't have to be subjected to that. When she starts giving him what he gets from you then she will be on equal ground. Good Luck!
You personal don't ever deal with the MIL directly. You have to get your husband to do it or do it together. But your husband must support you and be fair to his mum. First of all is to know the root of the problem and it might be easier to find a solution. If all else fail, you'll just have to make your peace with MIL. Make sure your husband is standing next to you and let her decide if she wants to be accomadating. If she dosen't then have less contact with her. At least you know that you've done no wrong and she and your husband know that. It's important to let everyone know that you have tried your best and still hold no grudges.
I can completely empathize with you...I have the mother-in-law from Hell as well...her last email from me was the one where she told me to ';Go to Hell and never come back';....



My husband feels a constant sense of obligation to her even though she has openly criticized him, lied to him, made him feel guilty, criticized me for having a chronic illness, refuses to spend time with her grandchildren aside from very brief visits with them where she essentially throws them outside to play or makes them stay in one room....



She will treat my husband very badly and then expect him to send her pictures of the kids and visit her and do all sorts of things despite the fact that she lies to him and puts him down all of the time.



I have gotten so sick of her cruelty that I sent her an email last year shortly after Father's Day when she put my husband down and I let her have it. I said things to her that were not only on my mind but on my husband's...in fact he was sitting next to me when I wrote it and he approved of the letter (that I signed)....



After that I was sent the Go To Hell email and criticized for taking up for my husband and myself and when I expected my husband to reciprocate the favor he didn't do it...



My suggestion to you is to lay it out on the line for your husband. Ultimately you are married to him and not his mother. She needs to butt out and keep her negative behavior to herself. If your husband won't stick up for you then you need to take up for yourself. If he doesn't like it then that is too bad. You shouldn't have to spend time feeling frustrated because your mother in law is treating you like dirt and your husband is allowing her to trample all over your feelings.



He is a grown man and he should take up for his wife. Good luck!
I went through that, ignore her and she'll she that she can't get to you and eventually she'll come around. Trust me. Your husband loves you so she'll get the hint that your not going anywhere and get over it
Obviously the problem is with you...taken from your own words ';How do I get my husband to c she is toxic?';, she is his MOTHER, learn to respect her whether YOU like her or not. Don't forget SHE gave birth to the man you married, SHE raised him to be the man you married, so if SHE is toxic then so is your husband.