How to deal with knowing your mother had and affair?

she made a poor choice like all of us have done in some area of our lives,and she did not maliciously try to hurt you,she probably is beating herself up emotionally and needs your emotional support moms are people too not super perfect beingsHow to deal with knowing your mother had and affair?
If you can understand why she did it, then you can accept it eventually.How to deal with knowing your mother had and affair?
blackmail could work nicely if you dad doesnt know
WOW,How did u find out? May be u should talk with ur mom about this, that could be a reason why she felt the need to seek comfort else where
try to be understanding. Because there's always was to sides of the story. And you may not know how she was feeling at the time. That is not an excuse but, it does play a major factor.
Talk to her if she is ok with it.

May be it might be a wrong information . Until she is a good mom now, it shouldnt matter you. Past is past and how a person is now should matter you so dont make a big deal of it if she is a good mom.
look at her relationship w ur dad. my dad cheated on my mom w a bunch of sluts. my dr. told me that he didnt cheat on me or my siblings so we shouldnt hold against him. i hate him 4 hurtin my mom n i swore id never do that, but ive done it to my ex. just realize ur mom is human n whether its somethin sexual or just feelin needed or wanted or desired, ur mom is missin somethin n her k=life or shes n search of somethin. ull b ok, i know its hard, but u will b.
Dude...I went through that when I was about 20. It was awful. Sorry to hear you have to go through it, too.



Realize that what you mom did is bad, but that doesn't necessarily make her a bad person. IF you can seperate the action from the person, that is a step in the right direction. At some point, you will have to tell her as well. Know that she feels awful about this, too. All parents I know feel the love for their kids more than anything in the world, so she is probably mortified that she has jeapordized her relationship with you.



This might not be an issue, but also realize this was not your fault in any way, shape or form. You might see this with your rational size, but you need to feel it, too.



Also, try not to judge too harshly or take sides (tough, I know.) There is no good excuse for infidelity, but sometimes a marriage is long over before stuff like that happens, especially if older kids are involved.



Good luck.
The best way to deal with is to find out from her why it happened. There was a reason. This will take some long talks, and some long walks and lots of understanding from you.

Did it hurt you? Does it hurt you now? She is going to be your mother for a long time.
If it's a thing of the past then there is no point bringing it up. Your mom's out of it and things are as they should be.



Though if it's on-going then you should bring it up with your mother first, as a family concern and only after you have enough to prove to her what you're claiming of her doing.



Whatever you do, handle the situation gently, with an aim of resolution and reconciliation.



All the best.
Do not judge her. She most likely has judged herself and believe me, that is the worst kind of judge there is. Most people never cross that line unless there is a reason and that reason is not usually the other partners fault unless there is gross negligent and or abuse of some sort, mental, and physical or the other partner has been cheating on them (does not make having an affair ever acceptable). In any case, as you get older, remember, that is not the behavior that your mother does that you love, it is her and her love toward you. Now above all, she needs love. You don't have to condone, just love.