How do you deal with your kids' spoiled friends?

I have a 2 yr old daughter. There is a 5 yr old girl on our block who is incredibly spoiled and self-centered. She'll come over and want to play with my daughter while we're outside, and my daughter absolutely loves the chance to play with the older girl. The more I see their interactions, the more it seems like the 5 yrs old only wants to show off her things or use my daughter's toys (sharing her own rarely happens). Yesterday, this 5 yr old was outside playing with another girl on the block. She came running over (leaving the other girl behind) to tell my daughter ';I'm playing with Paige, that means I can't play with you';, then ran back. My problem is that my daughter is still a lot younger and is very naive. My daughter wasn't offended by the comment, I don't think she even understood it, as she still expected to play with the girl. I don't want to be the mother that chooses her friends, but I also don't want her being abused or hurt by a spoiled little girl. Any suggestions on how to handle this relationship?How do you deal with your kids' spoiled friends?
You are behaving as if this 5 year old is deliberately hurting your daughter. That is probably not the case. At 5, she's still largely unaware of how her actions affect other people and can still be really self centered. Also, 5 is generally when the ';bossy'; phase kicks in. She is probably hindered by her parents not teaching her how to share properly, and if she is an only child (which I expect she probably is) she may not have had many chances to practice at it. Have a little compassion for her. She's just a little kid too.



That doesn't mean that you shouldn't be proactive in making sure the playing done at your house is fair and kind. When she makes statements that are hurtful, point them out to her. Tell her, ';That wasn't a very nice thing to say, how would you like it if someone said that to you?'; Getting her to think about the things she says is a good step to helping her learn. Also, if she brings toys over, tell her that it isn't nice to play with toys in front of other children that she doesn't want to share. It is okay to want to keep toys that are special and not share them, but it isn't okay for her to play with them or show them off to other kids. Make her take those things home. Also, whenever she does or says something you find to be rude or unkind tell her that she isn't being very nice, and that if she does something that isn't nice again, she'll be asked to go home. If you have any trouble with her parents over that, just tell them that while she is playing at your home (why they let a 5 year old roam the streets, I'll never know), that she must follow your rules. If they don't like that, then they must not allow her to play there anymore.How do you deal with your kids' spoiled friends?
You should be choosing your child's friends. This older child is too advanced and mature for your child to handle and defend herself against. Limit her interaction with this other child. Don't allow her to be hurt out of fear of offending the bratty kid. Get involved with sunday school, tumbling classes at the YMCA or a MOPS group so your daughter can interact with children her own age and so you can monitor older children who play with her.
This is actually common for kids. All you can do is if it affects your daughter, comfort her. You wont have much of an impact on the other girl unless her parents are teaching her.

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