How would you react if you found out that your stepfather wanted to date you before he married your mother?

My stepfather admitted to me that he was planning on asking me out before he knew that I had a boyfriend, who is now my husband. He admitted this to me after he had proposed to my mom, who was extremely happy with him. I felt since he had been attracted to me a year and a half before he proposed to my mom and he was planning on asking me out before they ever started dating that it was in the past and there was no need to upset my mother by telling her about it. I made the connection after that conversation that there had been some red flags to indicate how he felt about me. The entire time I was engaged to my now husband he was trying to convince me not to marry him, and he was asking me a lot of sexual questions about myself, like ';Would you ever have a threesome?'; ';Would you ever let anyone watch?';, ';Have you ever fantasized about 2 men at once?';. A year after we were married he proposed to my mom and 6 months later they were married. After I married my husband he tried to talk me out of getting pregnant. We just had a beautiful baby girl this year and my husband and I are very happy together. Up until our baby was born my stepfather was very social when we came by to visit and practically every time we came by he had just brought flowers for my mom or suprised her with a pair of earrings and they seemed really happy together, and everything seemed great. Now that we've had our daughter he's become very distant and leaves the room when we stop by, and my mom seems a little down on herself. I thought that whatever he was feeling was over and had moved on, but the way he is acting now has me concerned for my mother. He just seems very distant and my husband is convinved that he's upset when we stop by because having our baby kind of sealed the deal with our relationship and my husband thinks he still wants me. To be honest it's making me feel extremely uncomfortable. How should I deal with this? Should we just come to visit while he's at work? What would you do?How would you react if you found out that your stepfather wanted to date you before he married your mother?
He probably still wants you.

Just an old lech hanging out till the candy gets ripe.How would you react if you found out that your stepfather wanted to date you before he married your mother?
sounds like the Jerry Springer show to me.
He still wants you but you need to be honest to your mom and let her no what's going on he's a dog
I would be really grossed out! He sounds like a total creep.. and I would keep my distance
U didn't find it weird that your moms boyfriend would ask u creepy sexual questions? I wouldve been freaked out! I'd avoid him if u could. What if he's obsessed or tries something when your alone?
Well now that you have had the baby i do not think he is willling to go in and ruin his [[and maybe your]] relationship just to be let down. He probably wants you now more than ever, and is scared if he is in the same room, he may let something slip and that would cause tension or stress. I would let your husband know and your mother. Get your husband to watch the baby for a day and go have a day ';out on the town'; with your mom. She would really appreciate it. Then towards the end of the day [[i would suggest maybe during a nice dinner]] let her down easy and tell her how much you want her happy and that you kept it from her for her own happiness. Don't say anything like ';he's a creep';, because that would upset her a bit much i think. I like to be let down easy more than a simple ';blow off'; if you know what i mean. As for your husband - I would wait 'til the baby was asleep and ask your husband after you tell him to not go crazy and get into a fight with him :/ [[if he is a fighting type]] I hope I helped you.



Sincerely,

*Ashley*
I need a shower...I didn't even read your story and I'm not going to...I need a shower.
He probably held out the hope that before you married your now husband that he could seduce you. You are absolutely right about this man your precious new daughter is a major threat to what he had planned. If I were you I would take your mother out for a daughter mother lunch and tell her everything. I am kind of scared for you because this mans intentions have not changed, they have been altered because he has already told you what he really wanted. Be careful don't find yourself alone with him for any reason. Your mom has a deal with this without losing you...