How does a single mother deal with an asshole for the baby's father in your opinion?

Okay so I have been dealing with my child's ';sperm donor';. The guy has been selling and using drugs. So he can't be trusted. We are not together. Anyway so I let him come along to go get our son's shots done and am nice enough to take him to eat. I had not really had much sleep cause I had to work the night before and I said I could use a couple hours sleep. He said he'd take our son. I said that if he wanted to watch our son for a couple hours I'd just take a nap on his couch and he could wake me up and I'd take our son and leave. He said he couldn't allow that but he could drop me off at my house and take my car and son for a while. What kind of **** is that? I almost feel like ignoring him for a while if he thinks I'm an idiot. He aint got no car, job, or any way to help support our. He always talks about what he is going to do that don't get done. I'm tired of him.How does a single mother deal with an asshole for the baby's father in your opinion?
I sure hope that you visited your social services in your state to try and get child support from this guy....but I think you answered your own question. He's pretty much deadbeat, undependable, and wants everyone else to take care of him. Lets face it. He's a bad habit and the sooner you drop this character the better. Talk is always cheap. You made a bad choice. Now you have to do something with your life and look to the future.





By taking him to eat and listening to his empty promises your only enabling him to continue what he's been doing.





You don't say if you were divorced, married, or if the child came from a live-in arrangement. I also don't know if this guy is a violent man or has served time. If it was me, I'd call legal aid and have a conversation with someone that could tell you what your options are and then take it from there. If he's the father of the child, even though you weren't married, you can still get a judgement against him and possibly even get him arrested. You could make his live pretty uncomfortable and at the very least, he would have to get some kind of job to support his child.How does a single mother deal with an asshole for the baby's father in your opinion?
well ditch him then, if no good for you or son then move on, if he wants to see baby properly he can take you to court, whats the chances of that happening!!
He is an addict, pretty typical behavior. He cannot be trusted with the child, unfortunately. Draw the line, get some good boundaries going. MY sons ';dad'; is the same way... i do not allow him to see my son. He doesnt know where we are anymore, fortunately. I know he is still doing the same stuff because his criminal record is public knowledge. He just keeps getting in trouble. The most important person in all of this is the child. Take good care of that baby, screw the dad.
your right he cant be trusted, i think that every woman has to let the father see their child unless the father is dangerous to the child... and this man is dangerous... take your child away and never associate with this man again (if possible)
At least he is willing to see the child... I have one that is 3 and her father has never even layed eyes on her, but he does pay child support.
Don't let him drive off with your son





He might sell him for drugs.





Addicts are desprate people.
i would only deal with him when it is about your son and anything else doesnt matter, you are not with him. You only need to talk to him because of your son. and if he uses and sells drugs i dont understand why you would want to sleep on his couch while he watches your son, you would be putting your son in a bad place. ignore him and only communicate to him about your son then that gives him less of an oppurtunity to be an asshole. good luck, i know it is hard but please be a strong single mom and think about what would b the best choice for your son.
First do not let him leave with your son, that just reeks of some type of bad plan he's got.





BUT...


WOW do I ever know how this works. I also consider my sons father a sperm donor. When he got into the drug scene I left and took my son with me, took him to court for full custody and won (he failed 3 drug tests), he is supposed to pay support but I haven't seen a dime in years (my son is 6). Do your self and your baby a favor get the hell away from that a**hole take his *** to court and get full custody and get his *** for support to bad if he has no job they will make him or he'll go to jail.
i have no contact at all with my oldest sons dad he just comes once every two weeks and waits outside to pick my son up and brings him back the next day. i wont even let him i in my house ,like your baby father he's also a bum and has no job so i know how your feeling.


but with that said i do know him well enough to trust him with my son.





just ignore him for a while to get the message across that your not stupid , but don't leave it for too long or you might end up not talking permanently.
Your question from only TWO weeks ago.....





';My 3 month old's father came to visit last night. We are not together but he was trying to get me to have sex with him. I was just a little drunk so the ';I still have feelings for you'; just came out from me. He was all like I don't know what I want and said he was confused. I think he knew he wasn't easily going to get some so anyways his friend came and picked him up. Maybe before things got taken any further? I admit I did kiss him but now I feel so stupid. Do you think I scared him off for good with the ';still caring about him';or that he still would try to get his way. Like I said I feel stupid now. How


I should I act around him? Maybe just play it off like I had one too many drinks. I am just trippin that I ran him off for good and he just don't like me anymore. I hope he didn't like make fun of me with is friend. I don't think so cause he was like saying that I wasn't the one that should be sorry about anything I said and that it should be him. Do you think I totally ran him off for a while where he won't come see his son for a minute cause I made him uncomfortable or something.';





You're not mature enough to deal with any of this. Turn your life around, get educated and grow up before the state takes your child.
its really hard when the dad's a jerk, sorry i wouldn't have let him take my car or the baby alone either. The only thing i can say is never deny your child the opportunity to seen his father. That's the worse thing you can ever do. I'm not saying drop him off for weekends or anything like that, just allow him the opportunity to know who his father is. My boyfriend has never met his dad, although he had a chance to but his mom didn't allow it. Now he's 21 years old and doesn't even know his own fathers name. I really applaud you for allowing him to go to the doctor and out to eat with you and your son (even if it was only McDonald's). Every child has the right to know where they came from and form their own opinions about their parents. My dad was hardly ever around for me but the few times he did pop up (usually last minute) my mom always allowed me to spend time with him. When i got older i was able to see the things my previous innocence didn't allow. And my mom had the security of knowing she never kept him away from me when he wanted to be there. You and he made the choice to sleep together, so please don't purposefully keep him away from his son just because he isn't the father he should be (as long as he doesn't put your child in harms way at least do that for your son).
best to fill report to court about his situation and force him to get support child for your son! who ******* care about him. he selling the drugs hes LAZY!! Report the court immediately!





Start find your own job - driving delivery for pizza to driving and your son can sit in back. you can earn money. and don't worry about ******* him!