How to deal with your Mom always being the victim?

So my mom has a plethora of medical conditions one that is really affecting her is her Fibromyalsia. She has been on serious meds like Hydrocodone, OxyContin, welbutrin and other antidepressants, Morphine and so many others since 2003. That was the year that I got pregnant with my son and pretty much didn't have a mom anymore after she got sick and started taking all those medicines. She wasn't an active Mom like I thought when I was younger, of course b/c I didn't know she was going to get sick. She is now neurologically, emotionally jacked up from taking all these medicines that having a conversation or a disagreement turns into a waterfall of tears. She wasn't a part of my life in 2003 so asking for help or advice was directed to my Mother in Law. My mom of course was upset about it but I couldn't come to her with her cloudy mind she didn't know what day it was sometimes. Anyways, she is still taking meds even though she denies it and we butt heads all the time when she demands I take her advice on how I should raise my kids. I tell her I don't agree and that I will take care of it another way. I tried the ';OK kids we gotta go now'; line to make a peaceful exit from her house but now she is wanting an answer to her question to see if I'm going to DO WHAT SHE SAYS. She feels so entitled to saying what I should do with my kids that she insults me by saying I'm not a good mom and that I don't baby them enough and I never let her see them. What is an easier way I can avoid everything that comes out of her mouth? She is always saying that I don't love her and that I am such a mean person for not allowing her to see my son.



Another thing she is so much more willing to watch my 5 yr old versus my 2 yr old. What gives?!How to deal with your Mom always being the victim?
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WOW.. that's really not that uncommon, you see it all the time, people just don't believe they are impared and think it's ok to drive while taking the meds because a ';doctor'; gave it to them...



I would deal with that by finding another way of getting your son around, I promise you I have know people who were driving down the road an litterally just fell over-- crashed the car and never knew a thing about it-- all from prescription drugs....Find another way, even if you have to pay someone a LITTLE extra, think about the ';what if's'; that could happen to your little boy....I know it is difficult, so do your best to keep the babies safe.....:)



If you told your mother in law or extended family how worried you were about the children, would someone be available to help you? Also could you qualify for child care assistance, look online if you haven't already...:)How to deal with your Mom always being the victim?
I feel sorry for you regarding the difficulties with your mom. She needs more help than medications can provide. She needs a psychologist. Although it may be hard, if you and your children are negatively affected by her, you need to avoid her and get on with your lives. Keep in contact so she knows she is loved and that you are there for her but try to do that by phone or email.